


A Day To Remember

by flamegodess



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Grief/Mourning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-29 00:00:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21400798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flamegodess/pseuds/flamegodess
Summary: Five months have passed since Maes Hughes' death. Has Roy healed or is he still grieving?
Kudos: 12





	A Day To Remember

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, this fanfic is for my uncle. There are five months since he died and I needed to somehow express myself.

He had seen it coming days before it finally happened. Every month, Roy reminded himself how much it was till the day that marked Maes Hughes’ death. Five months had passed.

And that was the first thought that awakened Roy that morning. No matter how many times it went through his mind, it had always hit him like a bullet. Maes Hughes was dead for five months now. Half of him couldn’t believe himself. How silly to think that Maes’ loud and joyful presence wouldn’t burst into his office that morning to show him photos of his family. The other half of him always remained numb at the thought.

“Time will heal you.” Riza Hawkeye had promised him every month, but Roy had started to doubt that. Weren’t five months enough time to heal? The huge wound on his abs had healed faster than that. No, time couldn’t heal him. The loss of his best friend wasn’t an ordinary wound. It felt like a part of him had died once with Maes.  
There were days when everything was going well. He would go to work, he would joke with his subordinates, he would try to flirt with Hawkeye, she would put a huge pile of paperwork on his desk in response and in the evening he would head home. When he’d find himself alone in the empty flat, he would feel like something was missing.

At least it was Saturday and he didn’t need to go to work. He wouldn’t be able to bare sitting at his desk the whole day and pretend life was fine. He was sure that if Hawkeye would show him one of her sincere and warm smiles he would burst into tears.

Thinking about Hughes wasn’t a saddening thought all the time. Sometimes he found himself smiling or shaking his head amused thinking about him. It was difficult to be sad while thinking at Maes Hughes who wouldn’t want the others to grieve for him. But there he was. That day, every month, numbed him in his bed.

There were days when his subordinates would notice his low mood and would start talking to him about Hughes. Which was exactly what he didn’t need. Or when he happened to hear Hughes colleagues say If Maes was here. He wasn’t and he’ll never be again. While at work, he didn’t need triggers. He needed to focus to reach the top. In fact, hadn’t Maes sacrificed himself for him to reach the top of the country? Another thought that made Roy clench his fists in frustration. A tear left his right eye and fell down his face until it reached the pillow.

The thought that he might never recover from the loss panicked him sometimes. A man who would lead a whole country couldn’t have days when he wouldn’t be able to leave the bed. The other part of him didn’t want to stop grieving. He didn’t want to forget the fact that his best friend had died for him. 

And of course, after the first tears had fallen, he would start remembering that damned day when he had been so useless he couldn’t even save his friend. The Hero of Ishval. The Flame alchemist. Military’s most treasured weapon. The youngest colonel in Amestris. Who cared about those titles? Did those titles saved Maes’ life? No.  
Roy ignored the hearing of the front door. He knew the only person that had the keys of his apartment.

What hurt even more was the fact that Maes Hughes, during the last seconds of his life, had chosen of all people to call Roy. And Roy had failed him. A sob escaped his throat as he covered his eyes with his arm. He could hear the door of his bedroom being opened, but that only made him sob more.

A warm hand moved his arm that was shielding his eyes. Riza Hawkeye was sitting on the side of his bed, her palm pressing against his forehead and ruffling his dark messy hair.

“It will be alright, I promise you.” She whispered and her other hand held his.

“You’ve been saying that for five months, Hawkeye. Do I look alright?” He asked, not ashamed to cry in front of her. They had seen each other cry so many times that he knew he didn’t have to hold back.

“Roy.” She said his name as the hand on his forehead went down his face to wipe away his tears. “Maes’ loss will always be part of you. There won’t be a day when you’ll think about it and have no reaction. There won’t be a day when you’ll wake up and realize that all of a sudden nothing hurts anymore. You need time-”

“How much time?” He asked through tears as he pressed his right side of face into her soft palm.

“I don’t know. You will get used to this. And don’t make this day a sad one. Think of it as a reason to remember all those wonderful times you lived together. And I promise I’ll stay by your side, no matter how long it takes you to heal.”

He started crying harder so she leaned over him to kiss his sweaty forehead. At the touch of her lips on his skin, Roy wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a tight embrace, pressing her against him.

After a few minutes of silence, in which Riza’s warm presence managed to calm him down, she broke the embrace and got up from the bed heading to the window. She drew the curtains and light crept into the dark room.

She smiled to him.

“Did you have breakfast?”


End file.
